What Your Shoes Say About You

I don't usually shop at Neiman's (I am a Saks gal), but I take a look at their site every now and again because they always have a great variety of shoes online. I was looking through their "Irresistables" section, wondering to myself, who would buy most of these? I am sure there is someone out there that likes these, but they are all a bit too eccentric for my taste (and I am still scarred from those Miu Miu boots from last year). 

HOW?

Anyway, I posted some of the more out-there styles for you here. If any of you like these/are brave enough to sport any of these, I salute you.

What these shoes say about their owners..

I am a hipster with a penchant for tacky old-lady home decor (highly unlikely combination).

I am one of the wives on Rock of Love (best show) or I am Courtney Stodden.

I am Vivian Ward in Pretty Woman amidst my transition from prostitute to housewife.

I am wealthy but also dabble in Ed Hardy apparel (and have massive implants).

I am a Coug on the prowl (yes, that is a plastic lipstick tube on the back of these).

I am not from America.

I have so much money that I literally had nothing else to spend my money on so I brought NEOPRENE (read: child's swim shoe material) PUMPS from Christian Louboutin.

*all images via Neiman Marcus